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Category Archives: NINK

Cougar Life

20 Saturday Oct 2012

Posted by Spice Jones in Makes me chuckle, NINK, Weekend Inspiration

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Chris is rolling his eyes, Good Chuckle, The Film Biz

Just discovered the CougarLife.com commercials and I have to confess they’re my new favorite, awesomely terrible, thing. And considering the amount of time I spent working with World Championship Wrestling that’s saying a lot.  Now I’m not knocking 45 year old women prowlin’ for young meat (have at it ladies!) but I am calling out a marketing campaign that’s selling sexual empowerment with the image of a short bald guy wiping the sweat of desire off of his brow with a whole wheat sandwich. PS, the other three don’t count because we all know that young straight guys never look like that.

Watch and enjoy… but don’t fall for it you Cougars.

Wishing everyone a fabulous weekend… especially my sexy Cougars!

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Happy New Year!!!

01 Sunday Jan 2012

Posted by Spice Jones in Holiday Traditions, NINK, The Good Life

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New Year's

Holly Golightly knew how to treat a morning

Sleeping late on New Year’s Day is one of the many pleasures mommies never get to enjoy…2012, you’re already my oyster!

Happy New Year, kitty cats! May your days go lightly and may all the weather reports bring you prosperity! And if you don’t know what I’m talking about when I say “weather reports” put Breakfast At Tiffany’s under your resolution to be a better person, it will definitely do the trick!

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The Elf On The Shelf = Head Scratcher

21 Wednesday Dec 2011

Posted by Spice Jones in Holiday Traditions, Kids, NINK

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Family Traditions, Kids, Things I will NEVER do

Apparently The Elf On The Shelf drives. Photo from lilbblueboo.com

I’m expecting this entry to land me on every mommy-blog’s naughty list for being sacrilegious about the holy grail of Santa proof, but I seriously think the whole frozen-elf-that-makes-cutesy-messes thing is some sort of bizarre (most likely antidepressant induced) mommy competition that uses the precious naivety of children to win recognition and ultimately become Queen Mommy of the mommy circles.  I’m the first to admit that I know nothing about the joys of motherhood but I do know a hell of a lot of insane women and there is no doubt in my mind that encouraging this Elf game is 100% certifiable…

Continue reading →

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The Baby Urge

14 Wednesday Dec 2011

Posted by Spice Jones in NINK, The Good Life

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Chocolate, Family, Family Traditions, Kids, Southern Traditions

I admit that I get the Baby Urge maybe three (sometimes four) times a year but I never feel a need to explore the idea or raise the question with Chris because as soon as it sets in I start to remember all the reasons why I don’t have children and a “what the hell are you thinking?!” screams into my head, replacing the emotional urge for a child with a very real craving for something sweet, and VOILA! my thoughts are back to normal.

Well it happened yesterday so I thought blogging the experience would be a great way to share how my clock ticks… mom, this is especially for you:

Every Christmas my mother would dress us up and take us to ride The Pink Pig

A favorite Christmas tradition was riding the Pink Pig at Rich's Downtown Atlanta

First a special memory is triggered (like riding the Pink Pig) and before I can stop the thought, something like “How wonderful would it be to dress my little girls in Christmas outfits and take them to ride the Pink Pig the way my sisters and I did more then 30 years ago!” slips into my head. Then I sigh and think, “And after I tell my girls all about riding the original Pink Pig when I was a little girl, we’ll pose for the official Santa photo and then we’ll go to brunch with their aunts so they can show off their manners and share their precious little Christmas wishes with the family elders” (even when I daydream I razz my sisters about getting old).  And finally the most silly reason for wanting a baby creeps in, “Chris will love seeing my motherhood in action during the holidays!”…cue a tingle in the uterus.

But then I look around and see all of the chaos required for making these magical memories…

Families line up to ride The Pink Pig

I see long lines extending across the parking lot, forcing small children and large SUVs to compete for what little space is left. I think about standing in the cold for hours and hours, listening to fussy kids who no longer care about riding the Pink Pig and then hearing their exhausted mothers beg for patience while silently cussing the fathers for skipping out on another holiday activity.

The line for the Pink Pig continues across the parking lot

And it immediately becomes clear that my memories in no way match those of my mother’s and I owe the poor woman yet another expression of gratitude for not leaving us in the woods to be raised by wolves, a fate we truly deserved after misbehaving on The Pink Pig and saying horrible things to our own aunts during Christmas brunch…year after year after year.

And as quickly as the urge for a baby arrives it is replaced with more rewarding desires…

Truffels at Godiva Chocolates, Lenox Mall

Which in this case happened to be right next to The Pink Pig ticket booth. And because there wasn’t a mother in the mall brave enough to bring her little beastie into this magnificent truffle shop, eating expensive chocolate in peaceful silence is now my newest, most wonderful, holiday tradition!

Spice (and her happy uterus)

 

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I’m Spice Jones,

a Southerner living in Boulder, Co. I write romance novels, I travel, I garden, I cook, and, when I can lure him close enough with sweet words and tuna, I torment the neighbor's cat.

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